No audible heartbeat at the midwife's this week. But we are only 11.5 weeks along, so that's still a bit early. We did get to hear distinct "clicking" noises which the midwife said were kicks. So, there is something in there! Pretty cool.
Overall, things are improving. I'm not feeling as miserable as I was a couple weeks ago, or even one week ago - knock on wood! My pregnancy brain seems to be dissipating, as evidenced by the fact that twice in the past week I have found something long missing, not by looking everywhere for it, but by actually thinking and remembering where I'd left it. Miracle! The Diclectin prescribed by the midwife has helped the nausea get under control, and even my energy levels are improving. This must be that "second trimester" thing that everyone always raves about.
Another great improvement is that we have now passed the day when I miscarried last pregnancy - 11 weeks, 1 day. As that day drew closer and closer I felt myself becoming wound more and more tightly, and a lot of stupid fights with Chris were due primarily to that tension. The day came and went with no blood, no pain, no nothing - and the next day, off we went to the midwife and heard the baby kicking. I'm now at 11 weeks 5 days and starting to feel a real sense of relief, as well as the sense of awe and wonder that I've been waiting for so long to experience - at last, we are in new territory and I find myself able to really imagine that there's a baby at the end of this journey.
What I really need to focus on now, I think, is shedding the crappy habits I picked up during the first trimester. For the past 9 weeks I've been eating so much junk food I can hardly look at myself. My nausea wouldn't stand for the fruit smoothies and green salads that I usually eat; it wanted starches, breads, potatoes, hash browns. And I was way too tired to exercise. This has resulted in a gain of TWELVE POUNDS in the first trimester - I am not impressed. I already gained 10 pounds with the first pregnancy and didn't manage to lose it. So my new comittment to myself is more exercise, more fruits and vegetables, and less crap. If my energy is coming back and my nausea is fading away, I've got no excuse, right? I can't hope to lose any weight, I know, but perhaps I can slow down the gain enough to feel healthy.