Dear Gwen,
Today you are ninety-five months old. One month short of
eight years.
Earlier this month, you brought home a report card I can
only describe as AWESOME. It is ALL 3s and 4s (“Meeting Expectations” and “Exceeding
Expectations”). In eight of the twenty-four of the scored areas, your score
improved (either from 2 to 3, or from 3 to 4). You are ROCKING this school
year! This is especially impressive given all the transitions you went through
in the summer and fall. Your parents and grandparents are incredibly proud of
you!
The excellence of your report card makes the contrast between
your school progress and the stories of your day – which are primarily about
your experiences at after-school club, due to your short attention span and the
fact that after-school club is the last part of your day before we see you – really,
really sharp. Just about every day when we pick you up from club, one of two
things happens. Either you are upset about the way you’ve been treated (shunned
and/or bullied) by certain kids, or the leader is pulling us aside to tell us
about how you misbehaved that day (usually in response to the way the other
kids treated you, which seems to happen at specific times when the leader is
not closely supervising). Sometimes, it’s both. Oftentimes, this misery carries
over for an hour or more into our evening as we try to console you and get you
past whatever feelings of rejection and injustice you are feeling. It got to
the point where we dreaded picking you up from club, because we knew how
unpleasant the experience was going to be.
It all came to a head when your Dad and I tried to discuss
these ongoing difficulties with the club leader, who was the exact opposite of
receptive and collaborative. This conversation told us all we needed to know
about her approach to problem-solving, and we understood that nothing was going
to improve. So we started looking at other options. Having watched you struggle
to connect with other kids in a large club setting, and meanwhile thrive and blossom
in the one-on-one time you get with your Big Sister Christina, I decided to
find a sitter to provide after-school care in our home every day. I posted
about my search on Facebook, in case anyone knew anyone suitable, and I was
immediately and consistently gratified by the response – not that it helped me
find anyone, but that everyone who has ever babysat you before posted on the
thread about what a wonderful kid you were, and how much they enjoyed their
time with you, and wished that logistics or geography allowed them to take the
job. That was so cool! After several interviews, we have hired a young woman to
start with us next week, and we are all excited about this change.
The past two weeks
have been Spring Break for you, and there has been no shortage of adventure.
For the first week, you attended a day camp at the after-school club you used
to go to before we moved. You loved re-connecting with the kids and leaders
there. Yes, it was inconvenient to drive across town twice a day, but it was
worth it for you to have such a fun and positive week. Then last Sunday, you
and I walked on the ferry to Horseshoe Bay to meet Grannie and Grandpa. They
took you to your great Auntie Liz’s house to join in her annual Spring Break adventure,
wherein she takes all four of her granddaughters to Chuck E Cheese for a day.
This year, it was two grandmas and FIVE granddaughters! From what I hear, you
had a wonderful time. The next day, you and your grandparents headed up the
Coast, picking up your beloved cousins Andrew and Scotty on the way to Powell
River. I can only imagine that the three of you are having all kinds of fun
together, and hopefully not driving your grandparents too crazy. The house is
sure quiet here without you! We, along with your Auntie Sara and Uncle Dave,
will be there soon for Easter weekend. We are sure grateful to Grannie and
Grandpa for taking care of you this week!
There have been a few Spring-like days over the past few
weeks, and we’ve used them to teach you how to ride your bike without training
wheels, which you picked up faster than I could have imagined. We also bought
you a brand new, bigger bike, but opted to have you stay on the more familiar
bike for a while yet, until you are super comfortable with the new balancing
technique. I’ve got to say, watching you learn this skill has been one of the
coolest moments of parenthood. And for your part, you attacked this learning
with a dedication and determination that I don’t see from you too often. On our
first day of practice, you told me “I am going to keep trying over and over
until I am an expert!” Such a simple statement, and yet it speaks volumes. And
you know what? You DID keep trying over and over, and the only reason we
stopped is that the clouds had rolled in and the rain was starting to fall. The
next day we were at it again, and by the end of that session you had it
mastered – although it was clear by that point that the main reason you were
struggling to balance was actually that your bike was legitimately too small
for you, and that as you raised your knees to pedal, you needed to swing the
handlebars from side to side to get them out of the way. We had unintentionally
handicapped you in our wish to make things easier! Oh well, when you get back
next week you can start riding your beautiful new bike, complete with
handbrakes, a bell, a lock (which you are oddly fascinated with), and of course
a new helmet and knee/elbow pads. I can hardly wait!
I took advantage of the fact that you were away for a few
nights to clean up (junk out) your room, including pulling out a great many of
your old story books that you are well past reading. (Don’t worry, I still
saved plenty!) Most of your reading time now is chapter books, such as the “Dear
Dumb Diary” series and Choose Your Own Adventure books. You also still love to
read comic books and Chirp/Chickadee magazines, as well as the relatively new
addition of graphic novels such as “LumberJanes”. When I took you to Horseshoe
Bay last weekend, it was such a pleasant experience. Rather than sitting in the
noisy, crowded, and always conflict-filled Kids’ Playroom, we sat quietly
together and read our books for the entire ferry ride. YEAH! This is what a
ferry ride is all about! When you get back from PR, you’ll have a
newly-organized bookshelf with easy access to all the chapter books your heart
could desire – and the library or used bookstore is always an option when you
finish reading all those.
It seems like a long time ago when I heard from another
family that the rule for their daughters was, they couldn’t host or attend sleepovers
until they were eight years old. Since you were only three or four years old at
the time, I thought this was a good strategy. You, of course, after hearing
this rule only a couple of times, immediately began planning your eighth
birthday party as a sleepover party. Well, now you’re about to turn eight and
the plan can finally come to fruition! We are going to invite over three of
your good friends, turn the loft into a sleepover paradise, and have a super
fun time. We’ll start the full-on planning next week when you get back from PR.
Well, that’s it for this month, Gwen. As always, you are
such an awesome kid, and I’m so glad I’m your mom!
Love,
Mom
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