Saturday, November 15, 2008

Social Me

In a weird way, becoming a mom has made me *more* social instead of less. How odd is that?

Gwen and I went to a playdate this afternoon, which aside from being great fun, was the place of various discussions about future social plans. A Christmas party was suggested, as was a group trip to see Santa for the babies' pictures; an evening of scrapbooking; and a Wii/Rock Band/Singstar party. While some of these include the babies or are centered on the babies, the latter is an adults-only activity and is thus a real departure. Getting together just to socialize? For fun? Because we enjoy each others' company? Woohoo!

Similarly, this evening I went out to a birthday dinner at one of Nanaimo's fancier restaurants for a woman I know through various mommy groups. That is to say, we know each other only because we are mommies. It's really interesting to be part of real friendships being formed out of the mere coincidence of our babies' ages. It's slow going, because at any gathering of moms it's all too easy to just fall back on talking about the kids; in fact, it can be a real challenge to talk about anything else. But it's rewarding when it happens, as you get to know the real person behind the baby bit by bit.

I think I am more social now because I have to be. I have to get out to playdates and story time and so on, not only for Gwen's entertainment and socialization, but because if I just stayed home with her all day every day I WOULD GO CRAZY. The fact that I am consistently seeing the same moms a few times a week, and that we always have a conversation starter ("So, how is ____ sleeping?") makes the social aspect of these outings far less intimidating.

Tonight was a different sort of event and I was worried about it at first. The other moms I knew weren't going, and the only person I knew was the birthday girl. But I fit in, and I had a great time, and everything was totally fine. I think that the past few months of taking Gwen to various outings has been good for me. I guess I'm getting socialized too.

2 comments:

Amberism said...

This is where I wish I was in Nanaimo, as I've met NO Moms out here. Not a one. Everyone I socialise with I either knew before I had Callum, or well, you. I did meet and get to know one other Mom, then she moved. Of course!

I've been to every baby group imaginable out here, too, and just never seem to get to know anyone. They've all lived here forever, or something, or maybe I'm just not making a real effort! I'm thinking once Callum gets into preschool it'll change...

WordyGirl said...

I wish you lived in Nanaimo too! It is *ridiculous* that we haven't managed to see each other in ... what ... four months? If you lived here we could hang out and be snarky and cynical all the time. It would rock.

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