So, we've already covered the fact that there is nothing good playing at the movie theatre right now. Used to be, you could count on summer to bring out the awesome movies. Not so. Even more irritating than the lack of intriguing movies is the lack of ORIGINAL movies. Of the 12 films playing in Nanaimo right now, seven of these are sequels/prequels/remakes. At least if there were 12 new films about which you knew nothing, you could pick one at random and think "Hey, even if it turns out to be crap, at least it's crap I haven't seen before." But no! There are seven varieties of crap you already KNOW is crap, because it was crap last time and the time before that.
This irritation is made exponentially worse by the fact that earlier this week, due to the aligning of the planets, I had the opportunity to go see a movie with my husband. This is an event that happens extremely rarely and is one of the things I most intensely miss from our former life as non-parents. As the date drew nearer and the movie listings failed to improve, I told Chris that hell, I'd already sat through Sex and the City 2, obviously I could sit through anything - so whatever movie he wanted to see was fine by me. He chose Predators.
The premise is that a disparate group of people find themselves parachuted into an unknown jungle and soon discover that they are being hunted by the Predators - it's a game reserve on an alien planet, and the humans are the game. It's also revealed that all the humans are killers themselves: there's a couple of black ops military people, a yakuza, a death row inmate, etc.
The movie was pretty dumb, as I expected. (This is a great review, if you want more details.) But even worse than the dumbness was a horrible moment about halfway through the film when the humans have a moment to rest and regroup now that they know what they're up against.
The death row inmate says, "Man, if we ever get home .... I am gonna do SO MUCH cocaine." There's a beat, during which the audience laughs a little. Then he continues, "And I'm gonna rape SO MANY BITCHES." And then? The audience laughed even more. They laughed, you guys. I was suddenly jarred out the movie and into my surroundings: a theatre predominantly full of 20-something males, and yes, the theatre *was* pretty full because this movie just opened, and they were laughing because they thought that speculation about raping bitches was pretty funny!
I don't think that's okay. And I don't know where to channel my sadness about this. This line was clearly played for laughs, and it succeeded. How do I continue to be in a world where a lot of people - the people who made the film, the people who watch the film, the people who LAUGHED, dammit - think that's okay? What do I do with this useless mournfulness and stomach-dropping feeling, to make it useful? What do I do next?
Showing posts with label movies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label movies. Show all posts
Friday, July 16, 2010
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Movie Review: Sex & The City 2
Many Hollywood-made war films contain a certain convention, one that is so overdone that it was hilariously lampooned in Team America: World Police. (Link is very not safe for work!) That convention is to take any factual account of a conflict, at any point in the world's history, and rewrite the ending to say: "And then AMERICA stepped in and SAVED THE DAY!" No matter whether in fact, the saviours of that particular battle were British, French, German, etc., America makes the movies so America gets to claim the victory. The ultimate example of this, of course, is Independence Day, when AMERICA gets to save the entire PLANET from destruction.
If you've ever wondered what that convention would look like when aimed at women, watch Sex & The City 2.
I have never in my life seen an episode of SATC, nor did I see the first movie. The only reason I went is because there is NOTHING GOOD PLAYING at the movie theatres this summer, and I wanted to get together with my friend Shellie and see a movie. As a side note, I would recommend that if any of you need to sit through a terrible movie for any reason, you should do so with Shellie. And yes! SATC2 is a terrible, terrible movie, but that wasn't really a surprise to me - even with no previous SATC experience, I was pretty sure I was in for two hours of shoe-centric superficiality, and I was not wrong. But what I did not expect was the profound offensiveness of this movie, relentlessly hammering at me from every side.
Let's start with the opening. We learn that "her best gay friend is marrying my best gay friend!" Oh, isn't that exciting? We soon find ourselves at the actual wedding: an all-male show choir dressed in white tuxes and top hats sings show tunes; swans swim placidly along a river that inexplicably runs through the indoor venue; the ceremony turns out to be presided over by none other than Liza Minelli. The main characters exchange witty quips and one-liners written for the sole purpose of making the audience understand that these people are hip and effortlessly hilarious. Unfortunately, the writing is so flat and the delivery so self-conscious that the effect is mostly to remind us that we are watching a movie, rather than allowing us to enter their world, as any opening scene should accomplish.
Moreover, the one-liners are rude and offensive. Nearly every line contains the word "gay" or some other reference to the grooms' homosexuality. I'm not even going to bring in my own personal politics here; instead, I will merely point out that if you actually value and care about any individual, you don't use qualifiers regarding sexual orientation, skin colour, religion, gender, dis/ability, or any other descriptor that has nothing to do with your friendship. Therefore, the only reason to keep going on about the gay best friend and the gay wedding and the gay dog and the gay swans and the gay show choir and the gay gayfull gayness of the gay-ity, is to make sure everyone around you understands what really matters here: you have a gay friend, and that makes you cool! Liking gay people because they're gay strikes me as being homophobic.
The next scene, I feel compelled to mention, features Liza Minelli (who is now 64 years old, and looks every bit of it) in a sequined outfit singing one of my favourite songs. Please take a moment to fully immerse yourself in the abhorrence of this scene, and then reflect that the movie actually manages to get worse from there. Friends, I wish I were kidding.
Half of this movie takes place in Abu Dhabi, an Islamic city in Arabia. There’s a reason given for this, but it makes no sense and even the scriptwriters abandoned that storyline with no explanation when they ran out of ideas. Putting the four most superficial women in America smack dab in the Middle East allows for many racist jokes and opportunities to point out how weird foreigners are. For example, shortly after arriving at their hotel, Charlotte expresses anxiety that she can’t reach her husband via cell phone to check on the kids. Her friends’ response is to chide her to stop obsessing and instead, join them in rubber-necking a woman in a hijaab eating French fries. Clearly, checking in with family is a distant second to staring in open-mouthed ignorance at someone else’s cultural traditions. PRIORITIES, Charlotte! Tsk tsk.
But don’t worry, the girls don’t have to go to the Middle East to be unrelatable and irritating. No, there are plenty of ridiculous moments in the usual backdrop of New York, as well – such as the moment when the main character, Carrie, gets mad at her husband for bringing home takeout. We all just HATE IT when our partners do that, don’t we ladies? THE VERY NERVE.
The pinnacle of jaw-dropping, head-shaking, seizure-inducing stupidity comes at the climax of the film. The women are rushing through the Abu Dhabi marketplace, being followed by a group of men who are angry about the women’s [lack of ] clothing. This is meant to be a tense moment, and it would be if you actually gave a crap about these characters: they are hurrying as fast as they can, because the stakes couldn’t possibly be higher. Are they worried about being stoned by the angry men? No, much worse! You see, if they don’t make their flight in time ... they’re going to have to fly home in coach.
But just as things couldn’t get worse, a hijaab-clad woman gives the girls the high sign to duck into a secret sanctuary. There, it is revealed that underneath their traditional clothing, the Arabian women are all wearing designer clothing, the same items our “heroines” wear. Fashions that cost thousands of dollars, being worn by women who are legally considered the property of their husbands and are not permitted to hold jobs or earn money of their own. Why, yes! That makes perfect sense. Thank you so much, Carrie Bradshaw, for explaining this to me!
Speaking of Carrie, she’s got some ‘splainin to do when she gets home to her husband. See, she ran into an old boyfriend in Abu Dhabi, and one thing led to another, and they kissed. Carrie did the right thing in cutting things short, heading back to the hotel and calling her husband to grovel and whine, er I mean apologize, but it’s not clear yet how her husband will respond to this transgression. When she arrives home, tentative and anxious, he mentions his worry that she is “kind of a rookie at this marriage thing” and perhaps needs a constant reminder that she is, in fact, married. Then he produces a lovely black box and a stunning diamond ring. Another important life lesson: foreign country + ex-boyfriend + kiss + confession to husband = bling bling! It’s foolproof, right? (This is good news for me, as my passport just arrived the other day. I wonder how far I would have to go, both geographically and make-out-wise, to get a new watch?)
There are a lot of atrocities in this movie that I’m not even mentioning, and you should be grateful for that, because I’m pretty sure no amount of brain-scrubbing is going to erase my memory of Kim Cattrall gleefully sing-songing “Lawrence of my labia!” (Whoops. Sorry.)
I fail to understand the appeal of movies like this - they usually have me gritting my teeth to restrain myself from yelling, "THIS IS WHAT HOLLYWOOD THINKS OF WOMEN! IS THAT REALLY OKAY WITH YOU?" There are probably lots of women out there who are able to take this franchise (and that other one) as light, amusing escapism, without ever questioning the underlying messages. That's probably a happier way to look at life, but unfortunately it's not one I can manage to master. I haven’t seen a movie this bad in a long, long, LONG time, but on the whole my experience of seeing it was phenomenal, since I had the pleasure of sitting with a like-minded woman who happily and enthusiastically mocked along with me. Even happier is the news that although the mockers are likely in the minority, we're not completely alone. And for this, I am grateful.
If you've ever wondered what that convention would look like when aimed at women, watch Sex & The City 2.
I have never in my life seen an episode of SATC, nor did I see the first movie. The only reason I went is because there is NOTHING GOOD PLAYING at the movie theatres this summer, and I wanted to get together with my friend Shellie and see a movie. As a side note, I would recommend that if any of you need to sit through a terrible movie for any reason, you should do so with Shellie. And yes! SATC2 is a terrible, terrible movie, but that wasn't really a surprise to me - even with no previous SATC experience, I was pretty sure I was in for two hours of shoe-centric superficiality, and I was not wrong. But what I did not expect was the profound offensiveness of this movie, relentlessly hammering at me from every side.
Let's start with the opening. We learn that "her best gay friend is marrying my best gay friend!" Oh, isn't that exciting? We soon find ourselves at the actual wedding: an all-male show choir dressed in white tuxes and top hats sings show tunes; swans swim placidly along a river that inexplicably runs through the indoor venue; the ceremony turns out to be presided over by none other than Liza Minelli. The main characters exchange witty quips and one-liners written for the sole purpose of making the audience understand that these people are hip and effortlessly hilarious. Unfortunately, the writing is so flat and the delivery so self-conscious that the effect is mostly to remind us that we are watching a movie, rather than allowing us to enter their world, as any opening scene should accomplish.
Moreover, the one-liners are rude and offensive. Nearly every line contains the word "gay" or some other reference to the grooms' homosexuality. I'm not even going to bring in my own personal politics here; instead, I will merely point out that if you actually value and care about any individual, you don't use qualifiers regarding sexual orientation, skin colour, religion, gender, dis/ability, or any other descriptor that has nothing to do with your friendship. Therefore, the only reason to keep going on about the gay best friend and the gay wedding and the gay dog and the gay swans and the gay show choir and the gay gayfull gayness of the gay-ity, is to make sure everyone around you understands what really matters here: you have a gay friend, and that makes you cool! Liking gay people because they're gay strikes me as being homophobic.
The next scene, I feel compelled to mention, features Liza Minelli (who is now 64 years old, and looks every bit of it) in a sequined outfit singing one of my favourite songs. Please take a moment to fully immerse yourself in the abhorrence of this scene, and then reflect that the movie actually manages to get worse from there. Friends, I wish I were kidding.
Half of this movie takes place in Abu Dhabi, an Islamic city in Arabia. There’s a reason given for this, but it makes no sense and even the scriptwriters abandoned that storyline with no explanation when they ran out of ideas. Putting the four most superficial women in America smack dab in the Middle East allows for many racist jokes and opportunities to point out how weird foreigners are. For example, shortly after arriving at their hotel, Charlotte expresses anxiety that she can’t reach her husband via cell phone to check on the kids. Her friends’ response is to chide her to stop obsessing and instead, join them in rubber-necking a woman in a hijaab eating French fries. Clearly, checking in with family is a distant second to staring in open-mouthed ignorance at someone else’s cultural traditions. PRIORITIES, Charlotte! Tsk tsk.
But don’t worry, the girls don’t have to go to the Middle East to be unrelatable and irritating. No, there are plenty of ridiculous moments in the usual backdrop of New York, as well – such as the moment when the main character, Carrie, gets mad at her husband for bringing home takeout. We all just HATE IT when our partners do that, don’t we ladies? THE VERY NERVE.
The pinnacle of jaw-dropping, head-shaking, seizure-inducing stupidity comes at the climax of the film. The women are rushing through the Abu Dhabi marketplace, being followed by a group of men who are angry about the women’s [lack of ] clothing. This is meant to be a tense moment, and it would be if you actually gave a crap about these characters: they are hurrying as fast as they can, because the stakes couldn’t possibly be higher. Are they worried about being stoned by the angry men? No, much worse! You see, if they don’t make their flight in time ... they’re going to have to fly home in coach.
But just as things couldn’t get worse, a hijaab-clad woman gives the girls the high sign to duck into a secret sanctuary. There, it is revealed that underneath their traditional clothing, the Arabian women are all wearing designer clothing, the same items our “heroines” wear. Fashions that cost thousands of dollars, being worn by women who are legally considered the property of their husbands and are not permitted to hold jobs or earn money of their own. Why, yes! That makes perfect sense. Thank you so much, Carrie Bradshaw, for explaining this to me!
Speaking of Carrie, she’s got some ‘splainin to do when she gets home to her husband. See, she ran into an old boyfriend in Abu Dhabi, and one thing led to another, and they kissed. Carrie did the right thing in cutting things short, heading back to the hotel and calling her husband to grovel and whine, er I mean apologize, but it’s not clear yet how her husband will respond to this transgression. When she arrives home, tentative and anxious, he mentions his worry that she is “kind of a rookie at this marriage thing” and perhaps needs a constant reminder that she is, in fact, married. Then he produces a lovely black box and a stunning diamond ring. Another important life lesson: foreign country + ex-boyfriend + kiss + confession to husband = bling bling! It’s foolproof, right? (This is good news for me, as my passport just arrived the other day. I wonder how far I would have to go, both geographically and make-out-wise, to get a new watch?)
There are a lot of atrocities in this movie that I’m not even mentioning, and you should be grateful for that, because I’m pretty sure no amount of brain-scrubbing is going to erase my memory of Kim Cattrall gleefully sing-songing “Lawrence of my labia!” (Whoops. Sorry.)
I fail to understand the appeal of movies like this - they usually have me gritting my teeth to restrain myself from yelling, "THIS IS WHAT HOLLYWOOD THINKS OF WOMEN! IS THAT REALLY OKAY WITH YOU?" There are probably lots of women out there who are able to take this franchise (and that other one) as light, amusing escapism, without ever questioning the underlying messages. That's probably a happier way to look at life, but unfortunately it's not one I can manage to master. I haven’t seen a movie this bad in a long, long, LONG time, but on the whole my experience of seeing it was phenomenal, since I had the pleasure of sitting with a like-minded woman who happily and enthusiastically mocked along with me. Even happier is the news that although the mockers are likely in the minority, we're not completely alone. And for this, I am grateful.
Monday, January 25, 2010
The Blogosphere is Taking Over!
On Friday night Chris and I watched Julie and Julia. Just in case you haven't seen or heard of this movie, it's about a young woman living in New York who decides to spend a year making every single one of Julia Child's recipes in the famed book, "Mastering the Art of French Cooking." I was excited to see this movie for many reasons. First, it has been getting good reviews and looked, from the trailer, to be funny and enjoyable. Secondly, it was well-cast with two brilliant actresses: Meryl Streep and Amy Adams. But even more than that, I was stoked because this movie is about a blogger. The movie was based on a book, which was in turn based on a blog. Written by a young woman living in New York who decides to spend a year making every single one of Julia Child's recipes in the famed book, "Mastering the Art of French Cooking." And blogging about it.
I am a blog addict. It's true. I am bigtime hooked on blogs, and in a very real (and mentally unbalanced) way these people are important to me. I shed real tears when one "my" bloggers experiences tragedy. I yell "YES!" at my computer screen when one of them takes a leap of faith. Posts about the daily lives of strangers - insightful, witty*, thought-provoking, inspiring, hilarious, envy-producing, empathy-creating, and so on - genuinely affect my mood and my day. Yes. I told you I was unbalanced.
*Not actually a stranger. Hi, Amber!
So you can imagine how much it blows my tiny mind when the blogosphere becomes more real somehow. I've read several books that are based on and/or written by my favourite bloggers: Cringe, Things I Learned From My Dad (in Therapy), Sleep is for the Weak, Schuyler's Monster, Why Girls are Weird, and of course, It Sucked and Then I Cried. I've read dozens more books that I first heard about through blogs, the same way other people might get book recommendations from, you know, actual real life people that they meet with on a regular basis to spend time socializing ... what do they call those people? Oh yeah, FRIENDS. Anyway, my point is that when a blogger writes a book, s/he comes to the attention of the (perhaps dwindling? we hope?) portion of the population that still thinks blogs are weird. Depending on how the book is written and marketed, these Mainstream Non-Internet-Addicted People may not even KNOW that they are reading a book based on a blog, a book that probably wouldn't even exist if not for that Weird Blogging Thing.
And this, finally, is my point: the movie Julie and Julia is not just about a young woman living in New York who decides to spend a year making every single one of Julia Child's recipes in the famed book, "Mastering the Art of French Cooking." It's about a young woman living in New York who decides to spend a year making every single one of Julia Child's recipes in the famed book, "Mastering the Art of French Cooking and blogging about it. You can't miss the blogging: it's a major plot point of the movie, and there are several scenes that feature voiceovers that are word-for-word source (blog!) material. The film deftly draws parallels between Child's struggle to complete and publish her cookbook, and the young blogger's struggle to identify herself as a writer, essentially equating both types of authorship. That is a powerful message for the rest of us young bloggers, whether or not we dream of book deals. It's a powerful message for the rest of the world, too, those who wonder why we insist on documenting the fascinating minutiae of our lives and sharing it with perfect strangers.
As mentioned above, the movie has been well-received by both audiences and critics, and I was deeply impressed with the humour, the performances, the writing, every last detail down to the sets and costumes. I adored the way Julie and Julia's stories were woven together, and naturally I drooled over the food. This film has even inspired me to at last forgive writer/director Nora Ephron for Sleepless in Seattle. (I will probably still rip into her another day, however, for her book "I Feel Bad About My Neck", anti-feminist tripe that it is.) But really, you can learn about all those aspects on many other sites (or even magazines, newspapers, and non-print media like television and FRIENDS!). Here at Blogging For Two, you'll hear about why this movie makes MY life better, because it's all about me. It makes my life better because it makes blogging a justifiable and valued pastime, hopefully clarifying to the masses why it is we do this thing we do. Making it more normal. Apparently sales of Child's book have surged since the movie's release ... I wonder if there has been a similar increase in blog usage?
As a footnote: Heather B. Armstrong, one of the "realest" bloggers out there, has become just a bit more real. Apparently spurred on by being featured as a Jeopardy! question, she has now decided to take over the world of television by signing a deal with HGTV. Holy shit, y'all. Blogger be UNSTOPPABLE.
Oh, AND? About six months ago, Intel decided to sponsor a blogger's life list. As in, that list of a hundred things you'd like to do before you die - now paid for in full, and all you have to do is write about it. Now THAT is real, my friend!
But most importantly - Annabelle. Welcome, sweet girl!
There are 27 links in this post. Amuse me and tell me how many of them you ended up clicking.
I am a blog addict. It's true. I am bigtime hooked on blogs, and in a very real (and mentally unbalanced) way these people are important to me. I shed real tears when one "my" bloggers experiences tragedy. I yell "YES!" at my computer screen when one of them takes a leap of faith. Posts about the daily lives of strangers - insightful, witty*, thought-provoking, inspiring, hilarious, envy-producing, empathy-creating, and so on - genuinely affect my mood and my day. Yes. I told you I was unbalanced.
*Not actually a stranger. Hi, Amber!
So you can imagine how much it blows my tiny mind when the blogosphere becomes more real somehow. I've read several books that are based on and/or written by my favourite bloggers: Cringe, Things I Learned From My Dad (in Therapy), Sleep is for the Weak, Schuyler's Monster, Why Girls are Weird, and of course, It Sucked and Then I Cried. I've read dozens more books that I first heard about through blogs, the same way other people might get book recommendations from, you know, actual real life people that they meet with on a regular basis to spend time socializing ... what do they call those people? Oh yeah, FRIENDS. Anyway, my point is that when a blogger writes a book, s/he comes to the attention of the (perhaps dwindling? we hope?) portion of the population that still thinks blogs are weird. Depending on how the book is written and marketed, these Mainstream Non-Internet-Addicted People may not even KNOW that they are reading a book based on a blog, a book that probably wouldn't even exist if not for that Weird Blogging Thing.
And this, finally, is my point: the movie Julie and Julia is not just about a young woman living in New York who decides to spend a year making every single one of Julia Child's recipes in the famed book, "Mastering the Art of French Cooking." It's about a young woman living in New York who decides to spend a year making every single one of Julia Child's recipes in the famed book, "Mastering the Art of French Cooking and blogging about it. You can't miss the blogging: it's a major plot point of the movie, and there are several scenes that feature voiceovers that are word-for-word source (blog!) material. The film deftly draws parallels between Child's struggle to complete and publish her cookbook, and the young blogger's struggle to identify herself as a writer, essentially equating both types of authorship. That is a powerful message for the rest of us young bloggers, whether or not we dream of book deals. It's a powerful message for the rest of the world, too, those who wonder why we insist on documenting the fascinating minutiae of our lives and sharing it with perfect strangers.
As mentioned above, the movie has been well-received by both audiences and critics, and I was deeply impressed with the humour, the performances, the writing, every last detail down to the sets and costumes. I adored the way Julie and Julia's stories were woven together, and naturally I drooled over the food. This film has even inspired me to at last forgive writer/director Nora Ephron for Sleepless in Seattle. (I will probably still rip into her another day, however, for her book "I Feel Bad About My Neck", anti-feminist tripe that it is.) But really, you can learn about all those aspects on many other sites (or even magazines, newspapers, and non-print media like television and FRIENDS!). Here at Blogging For Two, you'll hear about why this movie makes MY life better, because it's all about me. It makes my life better because it makes blogging a justifiable and valued pastime, hopefully clarifying to the masses why it is we do this thing we do. Making it more normal. Apparently sales of Child's book have surged since the movie's release ... I wonder if there has been a similar increase in blog usage?
As a footnote: Heather B. Armstrong, one of the "realest" bloggers out there, has become just a bit more real. Apparently spurred on by being featured as a Jeopardy! question, she has now decided to take over the world of television by signing a deal with HGTV. Holy shit, y'all. Blogger be UNSTOPPABLE.
Oh, AND? About six months ago, Intel decided to sponsor a blogger's life list. As in, that list of a hundred things you'd like to do before you die - now paid for in full, and all you have to do is write about it. Now THAT is real, my friend!
But most importantly - Annabelle. Welcome, sweet girl!
There are 27 links in this post. Amuse me and tell me how many of them you ended up clicking.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Movie Announcement
Something that makes me really, really, really happy is when a director I absolutely adore ends up making a film out of one of my favourite books. This does not happen often, but it does happen. And it has happened this year!
Check it out!
If I had actually seen the trailer for this while in the theatre, and having had no idea it was in the works, I probably would have completely lost my mind with excitement. As it was, I think I read about it somewhere and had to go searching for the trailer, so the screaming Beatlemania glee was avoided, but I am still stoked. And the casting looks awesome.
Check it out!
If I had actually seen the trailer for this while in the theatre, and having had no idea it was in the works, I probably would have completely lost my mind with excitement. As it was, I think I read about it somewhere and had to go searching for the trailer, so the screaming Beatlemania glee was avoided, but I am still stoked. And the casting looks awesome.
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